Growing Up Ajay

Today, I got my tire plugged after I noticed that it had gone down a bit for the second time this week. Now, for me, this was a big deal. I had never had to do anything like this before. It was one of the first times as an adult, that I had ever had to diagnose and treat a car problem, all on my own. I got married young, so I pretty much went from the care of my parents and older siblings to that of a husband with very little time alone in between.

This little act, to me, was a sign that I was going to be just fine. That life was going to go on and I was not going to crumble under its pressure. I can be free and independent and adult. I can do things like pay bills, work, check tire pressure all on my own.

Keep your head up girl. This former housewife is gonna be just alright!

To Let Go…

I was reading a message board and came across this poem. Right now I know that this is what I need to do. I just hope and pray that I can find the strength to do what I know needs to be done.

TO “LET GO” TAKES LOVE

by author unknown

To “let go” does not mean to stop caring,
it means I can’t do it for someone else.

To “let go” is not to cut myself off,
it is the realisation I can’t control another.

To “let go” is not to enable,
but to allow learning from natural consequences.

To “let go” is to admit powerlessness,
which means that the outcome is not in my hands.

To “let go” is not to try to change or blame another,
it is to make the most of myself.

To “let go” is not to care for,
but to care about.

To “let go” is not to fix,
but to be supportive.

To “let go” is not to judge,
but to allow another to be a human being.

To “let go” is not to be in the middle, arranging the outcomes,
but to allow others to affect their own destinies,

To “let go” is not to be protective,
but to permit another to face reality.

To “let go” is not to deny,
but to accept.

To “let go” is not to nag, scold, or argue,
but to search out my own shortcomings and to correct them.

To “let go” is not to adjust everything to my desires,
but to take every day as it comes, and to cherish myself in it.

To “let go” is not to criticize and regulate anybody,
but to try to become what I dream I can be.

To “let go” is not to regret the past,
but to grow and live for the future.

To “let go” is to fear less and love more.